With all the “Housewives” taking over everyone’s television, it’s easy to forget who originally owned that title. It isn’t women who are married to football players, or are mistresses of basketball players and their husbands are not mafia criminals (well that is still up for debate)—in fact they are not even real. The only thing these fictional characters are, is desperate. Desperate Housewives. Gossiping, sneaky, conniving, loving, funny, caring, silly, mystery-solving, murder-hiding, desperate, housewives. And they are great!
Anyone who has been following the show for the last eight years knows how captivating, yet extremely tumultuous, life on the seemingly perfect Wisteria Lane can be. Lynette, Brie, Gabby, and Susan have given us ample reason to cheer, cry, laugh, gasp, and scream at the TV (maybe even throw your remote controller across the room), but now, after eight long years of watching the women of Wisteria Lane comfort each other during Friday Poker or gossip on the sidewalk holding their cups of joe, the series is coming to an end. Moment of silence, please.
Let us reminisce for a while:
The series began with the mystery behind Mary Alice, a neighbor and friend who killed herself for reasons the Wisteria Lane women could not understand. The four were convinced that Mary Alice’s husband and son were behind her death and they were determined to find out why. At the time, Gabby was having an affair with her teenage (but very sexy indeed) gardener and Susan and Edie (the Lane’s resident “home-wrecker,” ) were in a serious battle to win the heart of Mike Delfino, who was stirring up trouble of his own behind his suburban door. Meanwhile, Brie’s husband died (poisoning perhaps?) and Mike was almost shot. An intense first season, that’s for sure!
The second season did not slow down a bit, it delivered the nail-biting suspense and the gut-wrenching laughs just as the first one did, if not more so. Brie struggled with alcoholism, Edie married Susan’s ex-husband, and Betty White moved on the Lane with a whole new slew of drama. Betty’s character had a developmental disabled son whom she kept locked in the basement, because he murdered his brother’s girlfriend…only turns out, he didn’t murder her after all.
Other defining moments (in a nutshell of course), include Gabby marrying the Mayor of Fairview, who we find out only did it for the Latino vote, Edie stealing Mike from Susan by taking advantage of his amnesia and then later marrying Gabby’s ex-husband, Carlos. Lynette and Tom Scavo opened a pizzeria and tried to accept the daughter Tom had out of wedlock, while dealing with Lynette’s cancer diagnosis. And don’t forget about Brie marrying Orson, the pharmacist that caused Mike’s amnesia and poisoned her deceased husband. Then Katherine moved to the block bringing with her a husband being stalked by a psychotic former student and lover and a daughter who recently discovered she was adopted.
Of course I have to mention the tornado that almost killed Lynette’s entire family and Mrs. McClusky. Then, like magic, time was fast-forwarded and we met the Housewives five years later, with grown children (or children where before there were none) and everyone seemingly in a happy place. Edie had a new husband who seemed perfect for her, but in true DH fashion he was hiding a ton of secrets. Before Edie had a chance to expose him, she was electrocuted and die. Susan confessed to be the driver during an accident that killed a mother and child and her and Mike are no longer together. A family who may or may not be in the Witness Protection Program and who may or may not be terrorists from New York, move onto the Lane and Brie begins an affair with Karl, Susan and Edie’s ex husband (not at the same time), who is killed by a plane crashing—into him.
Soon Renee moves on to the Lane, confessing her affair with Lynette’s husband, Tom and Mary Alice’s husband, Paul Young, returns to the Lane seeking revenge and is newly married to Beth, who we find out is Felicia Tilman’s daughter and is seeking revenge on Paul. Susan and Mike are back together after he leaves Katherine for Susan and they have to move to a ghetto, due to hard economic times. Susan begins working on a soft-porn site, doing naughty cleaning on webcam and Tom gets a new job and major marital problems ensue for him and Lynette, eventually leading to a separation and Tom beginning a new relationship. Gabby’s childhood abuser comes to town and her, Brie, Lynette, and Susan cover up the fact that Carlos committed murder by burying the body. The cops are on to them and the friendships are torn apart.
And there you have it, some of Desperate Housewives’ juiciest drama, in a nutshell. If you haven’t been keeping up (shame on you), I suggest you Netflix the show ASAP!
Now into the last two episodes, I can’t believe all of this delicious drama is coming to an end. What twists and turns are you hoping to see before the series says goodbye for good?